Where women aren't women - and men are running scared

My wife sometimes says that I should occasionally shy away from controversial topics of discussion. Perhaps she's right, but then that just wouldn't be me. I do try, but the pent up pressure of sitting on one's hands when there's a fire to be started or stoked for the good of debate is just far too tempting..

So let me get the matches and let's get it started shall we..? 

Those of you who know me, or simply read my blog, will know that I dearly love women and always have really. I don't mind reiterating that fact.  I most definitely don't mean that in any patronising way, so no second guessing here. However I must add that I am rather concerned as to where things have been and are still heading in the world of the sexes.  I say that, as the divorce rate soars, more and more men climb out of the closet, and more and more women climb into it, it seems.  Battery operated self-'stimulating' gadget sales are climbing through the roof, prostitution is at an all-time high, Internet porn is rife and even books like 50 Shades of Grey have topped the Best Seller lists around the Western World for months at a time.  So what the hell's wrong with us?! 

Through careful study and consideration I have come to the conclusion that it may have something to do with the fact that women can be women's own worst enemies, and I'm not referring here to women bosses.  Not that men aren’t to blame too at times, but it is women who are unbelievably harsh critics of their same sex, and perhaps this has some basic human instinctive trait.  Let's be honest, if a woman is to be criticised about what she's wearing, her weight, the size of her bum, how much make-up she's plied, her piercing laugh, how she sits, how she walks and how and to whom she talks, it is other women who will quickly identify her to their friends and disapproving expressions will prize their way through.  Even through Botulism induced Botox I am told, and that's saying something.  

I find this all rather interesting, seeing how far women's liberation has come and the apparent desire by women to be taken ‘as seriously as men’ apparently are (though I think that one may have been over embellished).  But certainly to have the freedom to do, say, work where and how they wish to, without having to apologise for it, or take a lesser salary for their efforts.  And quite rightly so!

Ok, perhaps the burning of the bra was alright when one was in one’s 20’s, but I think we’ll all agree it was rather a marvellous invention (quick release versions at least), despite some of our fumbling and frustration back in our teens.  Nothing like acting cool and looking for those two devilish hooks at the back in eager anticipation, when in fact they just happened to be in the front on occasion.  Come to think of it, I’m sure that was an ‘entrance exam’ of sorts.  Ah the mysteriousness of it all.  But I digress, and don’t wish to make trite of my disquiet here.

I don't mean that women should be disempowered '50's dolls as advertised and promoted in the US by naive male advertisers, to paint a picture of suburban 'bliss', where 'barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen' was coined.  Look, 'consensually barefoot, naked and in any part of the house' perhaps, but the whole notion is rather silly really.  The emancipation of women was crucial, particularly for males such as myself who like a challenge and not simply women who lie down.. within reason. But things may just have got out of hand.  So much so, that people are just not finding one another any longer, at least not for very long it seems.  Even some of the more beautiful, single folk that we happen to know have resorted to on-line dating out of desperation, and even then without much joy.

So what seems to be the problem?  Is it merely that we’re ensconced in an era of instant gratification, or is it all rather simple?  I’m leaning toward the latter here, as I think the answer is undeniably very simple indeed.  Men and women were never meant to be 'the same', equals yes, but not 'the same'.  And before you go off your rocker and start lunging for the ‘Comment’ section below to raise your disquiet, please allow me finish..  

As much as men and women should most definitely have every chance of equal opportunity and equal rights overall, I have it on good authority that it is in the behaviour and over zealousness of some women to feel the need to ‘prove their independence’ and to emulate men at times, that many men find somewhat emasculating and not worth the effort. On the other hand, women may be the very one's to put pressure on other women resulting in the 'air-brushed', over skinny, androgynous types depicted in women's magazines.  Not men's magazines, despite us often getting the collective blame for the plight of women.  All of which I find rather disconcerting. 

Disappointing particularly to many single women it seems who often comment about how few ‘real’ men are out there, or decent ones at that.  It's all rather confusing really, isn't it?

So perhaps it’s now time to be ourselves, allow the natural masculine and feminine traits we were blessed with (nature/nurture) to prevail and do most of the work in getting together and staying together longer.  I'm no expert, but logic tells me we've possibly overcomplicated matters to our own detriment.   

Let’s get back to basics, on an equal footing..